All my life growing up I’ve been stuck between two racing bulls. I’m tied up to them and they pull both in their separate directions. When they get tired they turn to each other and ram their heads into each other. I run as far as I can to not get in between their way. 

I call one Mom, and the other Dad. 

Their collisions are mostly a result of their favorite argument: Should we work or play?

My mother believes in all work and no play. She works 60-hour weeks and doesn’t get paid enough. She is so tired all the time that she cannot have any time for herself to relax and play.

My father on the other hand is currently unemployed. He thinks that a simple job here and there will keep him afloat. Except he hates the idea of being tied down. He thinks a stable constant job will ruin his freedom and put out his spark. He loves doing whatever he wants all day. But he doesn’t work as hard as he should.

Because of their differences, they fight about who is on the right side and why the other person should do more of either work or play. 

My dad argues we need to free our human souls and find adventure and meaning to life. My mom argues we need to have stability and keep our feet on the ground. 

As their daughter I am stuck between these attributes. I didn’t know what I wanted to take with me into my future. 

I’ve had experiences with both sides. If I go and do whatever I want all day, then I feel sluggish and bad that I didn’t do any chores or any of my homework. 

Or when I have a whole day of working super hard, I feel like I cannot move after and usually just sleep it all off. 

I don’t think either of these methods are healthy, but I do believe there is a happy medium, and that comes through asking myself: 

What do I value?

What are my morals?

What is more important?

I value happiness, I value friends, I value security and love. I value being accomplished.

From those questions, I can tell that I really value freedom, security, financial safety, and adventure. 

These outlines help me realize that I value the middle between work and play. 

It’s never just one or the other, it can be all sorts of different mixes based on what I want my life to look like. 

I do want my future to have a rewarding job that I can work hard for and feel accomplished in. I do want to work hard enough to play hard enough.

This doesn’t mean the harder you work, the harder you play. Because I have seen firsthand what burnout can do to someone. Someone like my mom. 

“Enough” is the key word there. It’s always good to know when enough is enough and when to stop before burning out.

I do think a healthy balance between work and play is how much you are wanting to play. That should be put into how much you are willing to work.

As a future parent, I strive to find a guy who values the same things as I do. Then our kids don’t have to face the same dilemma my siblings and I had to go through. 

By catching this straight on I am now able to make better, more inspired decisions based on what I know I value and what I know to be a healthy balance.